Here we go again....

So here we go again....after a break with Chinese herbs and acupuncture, trying to lose weight (unsuccessfully) and a second opinion we are on for round 2 with a new fertility clinic....we now trek almost three hours away to SIRM (Sher Institute for Reproductive Medicine) with Dr. Greene.

I did a lot of internet research and located Dr. Greene through the SIRM website www.haveababy.com. I called the office and the receptionist was very friendly. She arranged a free phone consulation with Dr. Greene for the following week. I spoke with him and thought he was very personable and more concerned with me as a person and getting pregnant rather than as a patient without a face or a name. Although I thought I may have to pay a lot of money out of pocket (we fixed that via insurance) and a lot of traveling time (not too many times) we set up an in person consultation where we could go over my medical records.

DH and I met with Dr. Greene and we felt so comfortable there. He spend an hour or so with us discussing our medical records, explaining the process of how he plans on proceeding with us to my husband and we left excited, feeling like we have a big chance, and processing a diagnosis of PCOS. All I have to do is wait for next AF, call for a birth control prescription and wait for my protocol appointment. I am still waiting to hear on my AMH (anti Muellerian hormone) results as well to confirm PCOS. If so then I will start Metformin as well.

Dates to remember: Jan 7- Protocol appointment, Jan 14- Repeat SA for DH.

Why I've not written anything lately...

Its been very hard for me to get the guts to write this specific blog and it's only because its not happy news. Our embaby did not make it and we did not have a successful IVF cycle. I spent all day Wednesday, October 7, 2009 crying my eyes out on the hour. For some reason I knew in my heart that I was not pregnant, even when I got a faint BFP at 1o DPO. I've decided to skip the next cycle and wait until the January cycle, in order to de-stress and enjoy the holidays. I don't think I'd be able to take it if we did a November cycle and got another BFN. I'd be miserable and thats not fair to DH.

As for the new plan of action, I am going to start doing Chinese herbs and acupuncture and give that a go!

Good news and bad news,,,,

So we woke early to go to the hopsital for the embryo transfer. The doctor told me to start drinking water at 8am, because the transfer was at 9:30. Well for some reason my bladder got full WAAAAY to early, and I thought I was going to pee on myself THREE times! I convinced the nurses to let me release some of it, but DH decided it would be cool to try and make me laugh...not funny.

The RE came in and told us that overnight, one of the embryos had not made it. He told us essentially that I have poor egg quality, and that they rechecked DH's sperm and it looked completely normal, which means the SA from earlier was probably wrong. This was such a blow!! Ultimately, we had a good embryo to transfer, which they did.

I spend the next hour after the transfer sleeping with my legs up on the gurney, then DH took me home to be on best rest for the next 24 hours. I want to be on the safe side, so I'm chillin today too. I can't believe I have a BABY in me!!!

The only one responsible for me getting pregnant is GOD. Only He will make this baby survive in me, and He is who I place my trust in. I take my HCG blood test on 10/7 and will continue with progesterone supplements every night until then. 11 more days till blood test confirmation!

Egg Aspiration and Update on our Embabies!

On Wednesday Dh and I trekked down to the hospital to have our egg aspiration. We had to be there at 6am, the procedure being at 8am. The nurses were so great! I went up to 2nd floor outpatient surgery, then the nurses called me back to get in a gown and lay on the gurney. Dh gave his semen sample at 7:30 and I met the anesthesiologist who was soo nice! I was given twilight sedation for the procedure. I remember going down the hallway, knowing that the meds were kicking in..I was already fading out.... Then I remember all of the people in the small room and then I was out. I don't even remember them taking Dh's sample from under my armpit. lol...
I can't remember where I was when I woke up, either in post-op recovery or in the hallway. They did say that a side effect of the anesthesia was forgetfullness. In post-op they told me that I bled a little and the doctor had to put in a stitch, so the procedure took a little longer than normal. I went home and slept almost the rest of the night. My lower tummy hurts just like it did during the HSG. I am now taking tetrocycline and medrol four times per day. At night I am also taking a progesterone suppository at night to support the uterine lining.

Today I got a call from the RE updating us on the status of our babies! I was so nervous! Out of the 7 eggs retrived, only 5 of them were good quality. Dh's sperm count went up from 26.6 million to 50 million but his morphology dropped. RE told the embryologist to take the 3 best eggs and do ICSI (intracytoplasmic injection). Out of those 3 eggs only 2 fertilized. The 2 eggs left to fertilize by IVF did not fertilize. So were are so glad we did IVF to realize that we needed this to help make our dream of being parents a reality!!! We will be doing a two day transfer on Friday!

So we're not ready quite yet....

I went in for my 2nd ultrasound on Wednesday and found that we have 6 follicles. I was devastated, thinking that that number seems so very low. However Missy did reassure me that 6 is a great number, and that we don't want too many follicles, because fewer eggs are better quality. None of follicles are quite mature yet, so I will be taking three more days of stims, and added 1 vial of Menopur in order to help those follicles mature.

I had an acupunture session after my u/s. I loved it! It definately felt like something was happening, I could feel energy moving within my body. I hope the benefits of Eastern Medicine will help me with implantation.

My next ultrasound is on Saturday. I'll get my bloodwork done at the hospital because its the only place open then. They are now aiming for a Monday egg retrieval!! Let's hope these little follies mature by this Saturday and I get my trigger instructions...

Yesterday I had my first estradiol blood work done which came back at a 33. The nurses said this is in the normal range! YAY! Then I had my ultrasound and it revealed that I do not have any cysts. Very good news. Today I started my Gonal-f 300 IU pen, of which I will be taking 225 IU every morning for the next 7 days. The injection, like the Lupron, did not hurt. I dropped my Lupron down to 2.5 units as well. So everything is going according to plan. I can't believe this cycle is going by so very fast! Soon it will be over and God willing 1 or 2 babies in my tummy! Next appointment is next Wednesday on September 16!

Today is Day 3 of my Lupron (leuprolide acetate) injections!!! They are taken subcutaneously with an insulin needle so they don't hurt. Really. I can't belive that I really thought that they would hurt, because of course, I'm a baby when it comes to pain....I'm almost done with my BC pills. My last day is Thursday!!! YAY!! Its getting down to the wire...I can't wait until my egg retrieval which is in about 19 or 20 days...please continue to pray for us and that this IVF is successful! God bless!

Protocol Appointment Today!!

I was very excited to go to our protocol appointment today at the RE's office. They did a test "transfer" so they can document the way my uterus naturally lays in my body. This is done so that when the day of the actual transfer occurs, they don't have to guess to find my cervix and disrupt the uterine lining. Wow. Good to know. My uterus is normal, my cervix is normal so thats good news.

Since I have awesome insurance coverage most of my costs associated with this procedure are covered. My medications are also covered as well for low co-pays. This is such a blessing. I've already started birth control pills which I will take for 21 days. My last pill will be September 3. I start a 0.1 ml (10 units) of Lupron injected at night starting on Sunday, August 30 and will take that until the doctor says to stop. Lupron is used to prevent the follicles that I will be stimulating from prematurely releasing. This way they will stay in my ovaries until the doctor retrieves them. I start the "stims", medicine used to stimulate the ovaries to produce follicles on September 9. I will be using Gonal F. I will find out the dosage at my next doctors appointment which is on September 8. This will all lead up to an egg retrieval and transfer sometime between September 19 and September 26.

We also got the results of his semen analysis. Volume 2.5, sperm count 26.6 million, morphology 75, immediate motility 60, 3 hour motility 50. Which means his sperm are dying off faster than normal. This makes us great candidates for IVF because we won't have to worry about timing. His testosterone levels were normal. God bless this technology.

and then the obsession begins....

All day yesterday I scanned the internet in search of women documenting their IVF journeys for some hope of what is to come... I read up on Royal Jelly and L-Arginine supplements and I ran out to the Vitamin Shoppe to get some. I read on acupunture and called my contact on that too... My vanity is now starting to be covered in supplements, but will definately become full once the injections arrive. I'm now getting scared of all the horomones I will be pumping into my body... but I want a baby right???

And our journey begins....

ME 28, DH (Dear Husband) 31. So far we have been having sex, lots of it, and off birth control pills (BCP) since January 2008 and no baby. We went into escrow for our house in December 2008 and decided the time was right to "really" start trying. No baby. The frustration ensues. I decide that I want to be proactive and that something "must" be wrong so I seek the help of my OB/GYN. She says you have great insurance-see a specialist. I say okay and proceed to the only two Reproductive Endocrinologists in town who are co-directors for the fertility clinic. I love them...both of them. They are very nice men and I know they want to get me pregnant.

We go through a plethera of test, ME- HSG (Hysterosalpingogram-say that three times fast) results normal (thats where they check your tubes and roto-root them to make sure they are clear...it hurts by the way and I felt like Aunt Flo (AF) cramps like a motha. Day 3 FSH test (I think normal but haven't gotten the actual numbers), blood work to check something, DH gets semen analysis (waiting on those results), testosterone serum (waiting for those too).

First plan of attack. Its June 2009 and the doc puts me on 50mg of Clomid. I take it Cycle Days 5-9 and go back on CD 12 for an ultrasound to find that we have 2 follicles 11mm and 16mm. Those are both too small so 2 days later I inject my belly with Ovidrel which is a HSG trigger shot. This will make my eggs release. Sex Sex Sex. Wait 2 weeks. BFN (BIG FAT NEGATIVE) No baby.

DH is stressed out. I'm stressed out. We take a month break of TTC (Trying to Conceive). I sneak in a couple of BD (babydancing) sessions, no baby. BFN.

Decide to go back on Clomid in July/August. This time 100mg. This time we'll do an IUI (Intra Uterine Insemination). DH makes it with a cup. They wash away all the bad sperm and will turkey baste me to put millions of sperm in my uterus. Take clomid CD 5-9. Go to u/s on CD 12. ***BAD NEWS*** One single follie...11mm. TOO SMALL. IUI cancelled! Go back to start do not collect $200 dollars!!!

Now I'm frustrated. My sister has a baby August 9th. Her third. Conceived naturally. She's super duper fertile. I'm jealous. I want my own. I call the RE and say I want to do IVF. Luckily my insurance covers $15,000 or 3 tries. Three tries will be more than $15,000 so this has to work. We won't be able to afford it otherwise. So DH decides to be on board (no real decision on his part), especially when confronted with the stats.

Our chance of having baby naturally 1%
w/Clomid 4%
w/Clomid/IUI 9%
Injections/IUI 12-14%
****IVF***** 40% + (I see a winner here!)

So then I hit a speedbump. RE's awesome receptionist says I have to get AF by August 19 to be in the next IVF group in September. For me thats CD 28. Normally my cycles are 24-26 days. I have a chance!!! I pray and I pray and I pray and then one day (yesterday) I go to the bathroom and there in all her crimson glory is AF!!! Hallelujah!! Prasise God!! I made it and its August 13!! I called the doc and they phoned in a prescription for BCP and tell me to take it with a baby aspirin. Now all I have to do is wait till Wednesday...the story of my life...Waiting....